Do not fear failure but rather fear not trying.” Roy T. Bennett, The Light in the Heart
As humans, we all have fears. Almost everyone has a varying degree of irrational fear. However, for many of us, our irrational fears can impact the quality of our lives. The most common irrational fears are the fear of heights, spiders, water, etc. But some people have the fear of change that requires connecting with their inner self. A change that could lead to alterations that would transform our lives.
We handle fear in a few ways. We either ignore them and become momentarily brave and just do the deed and think afterwards. On the flip side, we sometimes find these fears daunting, and we are stuck for a lifetime fearing them. Every one of us goes through the ebb and flow of fears. Often these fears are irrational, like shooing away a bug or taking a deep breath and going on stage. However, sometimes our fears take away a potential joy and a potential passion from us. We are crippled with fear and left fearing it for the rest of our lives.
There is only one solution for it – try. We don’t have the authority to truly say that we don’t have it in us before trying.
Some fears that impact the quality of our lives are
1. The fear of failure – we fear failing because of disappointing ourselves and people. Failure is considered taboo in society, hence the rejection of failure. Atychiphobia is an intense fear of failure. We end up avoiding situations which could lead to failures, viz. exams, job interviews, etc.
2. The fear of rejection– How many times do we miss an opportunity because we are fearful of rejection? It also leads to being afraid of not being accepted by people, not fitting in, and not being liked. It could also lead to living an isolated life.
3. The fear of not meeting expectations– We are our harshest critics. We expect a lot from ourselves, and we always have the bar set high for ourselves. Atelophobia is the fear of imperfection, of not being able to do the best of the best.
These fears, sometimes rational sometimes irrational, lead us to not being able to show our full potential. Besides trying, here are four things we could do to change our attitude towards these obstacles.
1. Validate your feelings. Understand that we all have fears. Your fears might be different from mine, but we all are sailing in the same boat. Acknowledge your fear and understand it.
2.Believe in yourself. It sounds cliché, but if we don’t believe in ourselves, then who will? We are only left with ourselves at the end of the day. If we constantly feed our minds the negativity of not being able to do something, that is what we will become.
3. Have a positive attitude. Be optimistic. If we are not looking at the brighter picture, we will always be demotivated, we will always find excuses not to try.
4. Hold on to hope. It is unbelievable how hope can change everything. Hope is at the core of every individual. We have to find it and move on with it.
The best thing we can do is to just try, even if we are scared. Even if we don’t know what we are doing, something good will always come from trying. Don’t be scared to seek help. Times are changing, and people are realising the importance of mental health.
Sometimes our fears have a history of being related to traumas. Let a professional help you with the fear that is holding you back.
“Do not fear failure but rather fear not trying.” Roy T. Bennett, The Light in the Heart
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