Category : Women's Hub

In the quiet hours of the night, when the world sleeps and the stars blink in the vastness of the sky, I find myself wrestling with the reality of being a widow. It’s a label I never imagined wearing, a role I never thought I’d play. But life, in its unpredictable nature, thrust me into this journey, leaving me to navigate through its stormy waters alone.

Becoming a widow shattered my world in ways I couldn’t have comprehended. It wasn’t just the loss of my partner, my confidant, my other half—it was the loss of dreams, plans, and a shared future. Suddenly, the future I had envisioned was rewritten, and I found myself facing a daunting path as a single mother. At times, the unfair burdens imposed on widows, who are blamed for the loss of their husbands, exacerbate their pain and suffering.

The struggles of widowhood are deeply personal, often unseen by those who haven’t walked this path. There’s the overwhelming grief that washes over you like a relentless tide, threatening to drown you in its depths. It’s a grief that lingers, morphing into a constant ache in your heart, a silent companion in your everyday life. Being a widow means learning to be strong when all you want to do is crumble. It’s finding the courage to face each day with a brave face, even when your heart feels like it’s breaking into a million pieces. It’s about finding solace in the memories of the past while summoning the strength to embrace the uncertainties of the future.

But amidst the grief, there’s the practical side of widowhood that demands attention—the paperwork, the legalities, the documentation. It’s a labyrinth of forms and signatures, each one a painful reminder of the person who should have been there to share the burden. As a widowed single mom, I found myself juggling the responsibilities of grief and bureaucracy, trying to keep my head above water in a sea of paperwork.

There are endless phone calls to clarify documentation doubts and each one requires me to repeat the words, “I’m a widow,” as if saying them out loud makes the reality more tangible. There are the meetings with people whom I approach to guide me about my next step, where I have to make decisions that once would have been made together, now falling on my shoulders.

And then there’s the emotional burden of assuming the roles of both mother and father to my children. It’s the late-night conversations with my grieving children, attempting to offer them comfort when I’m shattered inside. Their emotional outbursts, yearning for their father’s support, leave a lasting void in their hearts and reshape their lives in unforeseen ways. In moments of weakness, I ache for my partner’s guidance, and his presence by my side, but all I find is the space he once occupied, now empty and silent.

But through the tears and the struggles, there is resilience. There is the quiet determination to honor the memory of my beloved, to live a life that would make him proud when he meets us in Jannah. There is the love that binds me to my children, giving me the strength to keep moving forward, one step at a time.

Widowhood is not a journey anyone chooses, but it’s a path that many find themselves walking. It’s a journey of pain and sorrow, of resilience and hope. As I navigate through its twists and turns, I hold onto the belief that one day, the storm will pass, and I will emerge stronger, wiser, and filled with the love that will always remain.

The loss of my husband almost two years ago was a test of faith unlike any other. It shook the very foundation of my existence, leaving me to grapple with grief and uncertainty. But through the tears and the pain, I turned to Allah, seeking His guidance and mercy to navigate through the storm. As the world felt increasingly unfamiliar, it was through His words, “Your Lord has not forsaken you,” that I rediscovered my lost courage and confidence.

This message is for my sisters who are mourning the loss of their husbands. Islam teaches us that patience and perseverance are virtues rewarded by Allah, so we must strive to embody these qualities as we navigate the challenges of widowhood. Finding solace in the words of the Quran, where Allah promises, “Indeed, with hardship comes ease” (Quran 94:6), we trust that He will alleviate our burdens in due time.
As widowed single mothers, we are reminded of the responsibility bestowed upon us by Allah to care for our children and uphold their faith. It is a duty we must take seriously, understanding that our actions and words will shape their understanding of life, death, love, and loss.

I also wish to urge and request all Muslim brothers, rather than instruct them, to make provisions for their wives and children in case of their passing. This includes various aspects, but I want to emphasize the importance of proper documentation.

For husbands, preparing for the possibility of their passing means fulfilling their duty to their families even beyond their lifetime. It means taking the necessary steps to ensure that their loved ones are not left in financial hardship or legal uncertainty. It means safeguarding the future of their wives and children with careful planning and foresight.

In the event of their passing, husbands should ensure that their wives have access to important documents. They should also communicate their wishes regarding burial arrangements and any religious rituals to be performed.

But beyond the practical matters, husbands should also strive to leave behind a legacy of love and compassion. They should nurture their relationships with their wives and children, strengthening the bonds of family and faith that will endure even in their absence. The husband must have a good attitude towards his wife and be kind to her, and offer her everything that may soften her heart towards him, because Allah says (interpretation of the meaning):“…and live with them honorably.” [al-Nisa 4:19] and our beloved Prophet Mohammed SA said “Fear Allah concerning women! Verily you have taken them on the security of Allah..”

In the serene moments of prayer, as I humbly submit to the will of Allah, I find solace in the knowledge that my journey through widowhood is guided by His mercy and wisdom. As a Muslim widow, my struggles are intertwined with the teachings of Islam, providing me with a source of strength and comfort amidst life’s trials. As I walk this path of widowhood, I am reminded that my journey is not one of despair, but of faith and resilience. With Al Wadood, the Most Merciful, by my side, I face each day with hope in my heart, knowing that He is ever gracious and compassionate.

Though the road may be long and difficult, I trust in His plans and His promises to ease my burden and grant me peace in this life and the Hereafter. Ultimately, I look forward to finally meeting the father of my children.

6 Comments

  1. Humera

    May Allah heal and comfort your heart, may Him bless you and your lovely kids with more resilience and solace…May Him guide and bless yr family with barakah and Afiyah in every decision you make…

    Reply
  2. Nahida Nasreen

    Very touching. The writing potrays your grief , turmoil, courage and faith. May Allah swt keep you steadfast in your faith and may he bless you and your family with more resilience and courage to carry forward. May he make your journey easy. Aameen.

    Reply
  3. Shivangi Singh

    Emotional, touching, brave!

    Reply
  4. Shivani Sinha

    Very touching. May your strength and conviction continue to guide you on your path, and may Allah grant you solace and peace.

    Reply
  5. Usmankhan

    It was a painful reading but Allah gives us sabr. Surah Zuha and Alam Nashrah are helpful to every one.

    Reply
  6. G D Nadaf

    Whatever happens happens for the good. We should have unstinted faith on Almighty Allaha. Pray for his mercy. ????. Aameen summa Aameen.

    Reply

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