Please try to understand. I am not a robot. I have feelings. I can’t…I can’t…it is my blood.” Neena pleaded. They lived happily together, challenging all societal norms for the past five years without seemingly having any problems. But Neena always had the fear of this moment. When they decided to live together, Raju only demanded, “No third person should come into our life as a hindrance. I want you fully. I am very possessive. I can’t bear you sharing your love with anyone else.”
Those words of Raju sounded like those of a lover who dies for his beloved. Neena had no hesitation in leaving her home and did not heed her parents’ warnings about the outcome of such a relationship. Each time her mother advised her, she took them as interfering with her private life. Sometimes, she would surrender to her tears and think of reconsidering her decision. But when she went to her friends’ circle, they would remind her of the challenge she made. It was that she would select a live-in relationship with no bondage to each other. Her arguments were, “I don’t want to suffer like my mom.”; “I want to spend my days and nights as I wish.” “I can’t do all the cooking and washing.”
Raju became a hero in her life, supporting her notion of liberated life. He shared his dream of a carefree life with no interference from in-laws, no societal rules, no religious ceremonies, nothing. Life was smooth, even though there used to be some arguments related to household chores and spending. They had privacy, and there was no one to question when they reached home late at night or had drinking night parties at home. Neena could bear with Raju when he crossed his limits in his behaviour with other female friends, as their decision was not to interfere with each other’s private matters. She feared their friends would brand her old-fashioned if she stopped Raju from socialising with other girls.
It was the fifth anniversary of their journey as life partners. On this particular day, Neena had breaking news. She waited impatiently for the celebration to end. When all their friends left, she slowly entered their bedroom. She took Raju’s right hand and pressed it on her tummy. Excitedly, she asked: “Do you know what is happening inside?”. Raju, hungover from the party, asked rudely: “What? Tell me quickly. I am not in a mood. Want to sleep.”
Neena, with great hesitation, broke the news. “A new Raju is growing there.” “What!” exclaimed Raju. “Are you mad? Did you forget our decision? That means you were not taking the tablet. This is cheating.” Neena broke into tears. She tried to convince him by saying, “We need offspring in memory of our relationship; we need someone to look after us when we are old; how nice it would be to have a baby in our house!” and so on.
But Raju was boiling with anger. He said whatever came to his mouth. She patiently bore with all this, thinking that these were his immediate reactions as usual, and she would be able to convince him in the morning.
They got up late the next morning, as has been the routine after such parties. Raju rushed to get ready for the office. Neena wasn’t in a hurry as she had taken leave for one week, per her doctor’s advice. Raju asked whether she was not getting ready as though nothing happened the previous night. Neena felt relaxed, thinking he had accepted the fact, and now there was no problem. She told him: “I told you, right? Now I need rest for one week.” On hearing this, Raju again started shouting at her. This time, he was in his senses, and each word he shouted pierced Neena’s mind like an arrow. Neena tried to convince him and pleaded with him to accept the baby. But he was stern and continued to abuse her. The most pricking was his question: “Are you sure it is mine?”. Neena collapsed. She asked: “Is this the trust upon which I have been living with you for the past five years? How foolish I am.”
Raju gave her a cold look and left for the office. Neena tried to soothe herself, thinking he would be alright by the evening. She wished he would come with a flower as he used to do on special occasions and hug her. She felt like she missed her mother too much. She went to sleep for a while after brunch. At 3 pm, she woke up. Checked WhatsApp to see if there was any sorry message from Raju, as he usually does after a fight. She saw the green sign and happily opened it. “If you are serious about the baby, let us break up. Let me know whether you will leave the house or I should. I am Ok with both options. Reply before I come home so that I can make the arrangements.”
Usually, it was Neena who used to give up on any arguments. But this time, she was firm. “It’s a matter of my child, my blood, my hope, my everything. I am not going to give up. I will raise my child all alone. But how? Who will support? My friends? No, never.” She remembered every piece of advice from her parents. Her mother’s advice that there is no going back to the past when you regret was piercing into her guilty mind, and she felt like ending herself. But the thought of a life growing within her pulled her back. She thought, “Let me call mom. I am sure she will accept me. My parents are good. They still love me. I can convince them. My one ‘sorry’ will make them forget all that I did. I am their blood. So is my baby.” She pressed her hand on her tummy and felt great relief.
Neena took the phone and called her mother. A strange voice answered. On her enquiry about her mother, she said that she passed away two months back. She told her to connect to her father. The reply was, “He died one year back. And it is due to that sorrow and loneliness that your mom also died.” Neena felt like the earth was splitting into two, and she was drowning. She looked through the window at the sky, not knowing what to do.
Marriage is a must 👌 in any culture or country. Living together ❤ looks like real in the beginning but it is really a mirage. In any situation the most affected person is the woman. So women should be more careful before taking any decision just like that 🤔